I can’t watch TV any more without a box of tissues by my side. I cry at everything these days. My emotion button is so big and so easy to punch that I feel as if I’m leaking. I used to cry like this when I was a kid until my parents kept telling me to stop, so I did. It’s taken decades to let myself cry at anything again. And I love it. They’re not usually tears of sadness, just tears of emotion (Except at those dog videos on FB. Why are people posting those?). And it feels great. And then I laugh at myself and I feel even better. Here are a bunch of holiday ones to start you off.
It’s the same with movies. I just saw Moana. I cried through half of it. Not because it’s sad, but because it’s so . And because I realized that I need to hear the voice of my soul again, which is the key message of the movie. I haven’t heard it for a while and it’s time for me to listen again. I think all the crying I’ve been doing (good crying) will help clear away the muck that’s been dampening the song.
I have been frozen. Figuratively, not literally. I can’t bring myself to write because of the explosive and uncertain times we now live in. As a student of history (yes, I have a history degree), I can’t bring myself to think that my puny little career can change anything. As a student of literature (I have two lit degrees), I know that fiction doesn’t change the world. Few, very few, books have had an effect on bringing about social progress. Yes, I know that reading fiction encourages empathy, but I don’t have enough readers to make much of a difference anyway (That is not a whine; it is a statement of fact. I write because I like to tell stories; I have long since given up the delusion that I will have enough influence to affect a difference.)
Right now I’m trying to figure out what I can do.
Books I’m reading now:
Rereading for escape: The Ryria Chronicles by Michael J Sullivan
I would rather stay home and play games than go out anywhere. Even when we went to Costa Rica, I brought two decks of cards, and on two separate extremely rainy nights, we played canasta. That’s right. I’m forcing my children back into the dark ages. We spend many an evening playing games like Ticket to Ride, Seven Wonders, Settlers of Catan, and the latest ones I’ve tried were Carcassonne and Pandemic. And don’t forget the old stand-bys like Scattergories, Balderdash, Pictionary, and Cranium. I have one game that I love that most people haven’t heard of called Scrutinize. I don’t know why that game didn’t become a classic. It’s great.
We play card games and board games. We even play sports games, e.g., volleyball and golf. Robot Guy and I like competition so much that we used to play crazy eights in bed to see who would have to turn out the lights.
When I’m alone, I love puzzles. Sudoku, crossword, logic (especially logic), jigsaw; I love them all. My favorite video games are the ones where you solve puzzles. Just recently I subscribed to the Mystery Experience Company and they send a mystery to solve every month. I’ve only done one so far, but it was well done and of high quality. Just my sort of thing. Games Magazine has been an on-again-off-again subscription for me for years. And, yes, I am the person that does the puzzles in the back of the airline magazines.
I have yet to try one of the escape room puzzles, but they require a group and that brings up a problem. With the kids out of the house and being such a homebody, it’s basically just me and Robot Guy. In fact many games require more than two people. I’d love suggestions for two person games.
My next move is to watch a few of Wil Wheaton’s Table Top videos. I really can’t understand why I haven’t seen those yet.
I have glommed every show I was really interested in watching on Netflix, and have now moved onto my second tier, the ones that look okay, but aren’t exactly my thing. I have a rule: if it doesn’t capture my attention in three episodes, I won’t watch again. So what shows did capture my attention? Number one is Leverage. It had the perfect blend of suspense and humor and good old-fashioned justice to keep me riveted. I aim to write stories that capture the feel of Leverage. I also enjoyed White Collar, The IT crowd, Silicon Valley, Psych, The Detectorists, and Dr. Who. I also enjoy some grittier fare: Person of Interest, Burn Notice, Midsommer Murders, Foyle’s War, and yes, even NCIS and Criminal Minds. I thought there weren’t enough episodes of Lie to Me, and The Finder, and I’ve stopped watching The Glades because I know the series ended on a cliffhanger that will never be resolved. I don’t need any more unfinished stories to haunt me the rest of my life. Get any grittier than that, and I won’t watch (Criminal Minds is right on that line).
There are a lot of other shows I like, but these are the ones that I watched on binges. I’ve tried watching other shows that people binge on and talk about, but I just didn’t get into them. I did watch BReaking Bad, but it wasn’t really binging because it took a while to watch. Robot Guy and I watched together and he isn’t a binge watcher, so I had to wait. It isn’t my kind of thing. I can recognize the great writing and the terrific acting, but I watched for two reasons: one, it’s Albuquerque, and two, everyone said I had to. No, I don’t always do what everyone tells me to, but as a member of the popular culture community, I need to be familiar with phenomena. I’ve read a few books because of that too. (shudder)
Still, Leverage stands out. I like to laugh; I like the light touch in storytelling; I like justice in an unjust world. Leverage does that perfectly. It hits the same notes I try to hit in my stories.
I don’t really have a point to this blog. It’s more like emptying my brain of extraneous thoughts, like a pensieve. Maybe it’s just to show you my taste and hope you’ll try some of my books to see if I’m spot on or completely insane to think that’s what I write. Maybe it’s because I’m so effing disgusted with the state of the world and real news right now, I just want to escape.
By the way, Game of Thrones has gone from binge to regular watching, so it didn’t make this list.
In which I drop the famous names I saw this weekend.
This past weekend I attended Bubonicon. Bubonicon is exactly what it sounds like—the local SF/Fantasy con here in Albuquerque named after something New Mexico is famous for—the bubonic plague (we still have it fairly regularly here). I was honored to be on three panels and participate in the massive book signing they have. I always give away my books for NM tax reasons, unless someone has already bought my books at a bookstore (on site, so it’s easy to buy).
First let me just say it’s always nice to speak to and answer questions from people interested in my work—even if they come to hear someone way more famous than I. I was on a panel on Villains with SM Stirling, Caroline Spector, Joe Lansdale and Andy Kuhn. I love writing villains (which I’ve posted about here), and it listening and adding to the conversation showed me a few things as well. By the way, for me the most interesting book with villains is Agatha Christie’s And Then There Were None. Read it and find out why.
I then was on a panel on self-publishing and sat next to Rachel Caine (!). The panel also featured Emily Mah, Pari Noskin, Robert Vardeman, and David Summers. An interesting give-and-take here. My biggest take is that I have absolutely failed in creating a newsletter and email list, mostly because I hate those things myself so I don’t want to subject anyone else to them. Besides, I’m not so interesting.
The last panel I was on was called Good Writing: I Know What I Like. We spoke about what makes a story, what makes them good, and what our processes comprise. Big names here: Stephen Donaldson, John Maddox Roberts, Ben Bova, and Pari again.
My big name drop of the weekend though has to be that I stood in a conversation circle with Connie Willis, Melinda Snodgrass, Jeffe Kennedy, and Darynda Jones, and we were joined by George RR Martin (It pays to be friends with Darynda). Not that I said a word (I’ve also posted about my shyness here). He likes to laugh. I like that in a person. And he wouldn’t recognize me again. Not only did I not say a word, I had forgotten my name tag at home so nobody had a clue who I was.
But the absolutely highlights of my weekend were two tiny incidents. The first was Pari Noskin, who came up to me and said that she was so happy to be on panels with me because she loves my work and respects me so much. What an absolutely beautiful thing to say and I don’t think I can even express how much those words meant to me especially coming from a colleague. The second was at the book signing. A couple came up to me, having bought my book, and they told me that my words on the panel on writing helped them so much, and they thanked me for appearing. They had gone out to buy THE WISH LIST, which I gladly signed for them, but I also gave them a copy of THE STONE KEY. To have total strangers admire oneself is such a joy.
So that was my name-dropping weekend. No, I can’t tell you when George will be finished with his series.
Books I’m reading now:
Harry Potter und der Feuerkelch by JK Rowling (That’s right; German, baby)
…Not. Okay mornings are beautiful, but that doesn’t mean I like them.
I am not a morning person. I do like the empty streets of predawn, the color of the sky as the sun opens onto it, the coolness of the air, but waking up for it is hell. I know what morning is like because I spent several years waking up at 4:45 AM to begin my morning routine for teaching, so I could be at work by 7:30 AM. Even at writers’ conferences, where a number of us are late night people, the workshops and meetings start at 8:00AM. I also have bouts of insomnia, like yesterday, when I wake up too, too early and my brain won’t shut up and let me sleep again. But let me be clear–only because the world seems to think that morning is somehow more morally upstanding do I even try to open my eyes before 10:00 AM. Those damn robo calls start at 8:30AM. (As an aside, who the hell thinks those things work anyway? I can tell you right now that I will never buy or sign up for anything if you call me first. I make the calls in such instances. And I don’t believe your lies either. Neither that you are from Windows Computers, or that “this call is returning your request about the back brace you saw on TV.” I got that one this morning. Guess what? I didn’t watch some commercial about a back brace, nor do I need one. Perhaps someday, but if I do, I will call first!)
If I had my druthers, I would stay up until 2:00 AM or later and then wake up accordingly. But the world doesn’t work that way, and I am a lone, insignificant individual who has no power to change it, so wake I must. Crueler still is that I must drive The Youngest to work and her shifts often start at 6:00AM. This morning for example. As I was driving home from dropping her off, I noticed how many people were up taking advantage of the cool air. They were jogging, strolling, or walking their dogs. Good God. Even my dogs aren’t morning people. When I left the house, they were both still sleeping in their spots.
Worse, my mother is an early riser. I don’t care how old you are, your mother can do a guilt trip better than anyone, and she is firmly of the belief that anyone who sleeps in is lazy. I’ve tried to explain (since I was a teenager) that I work or do things into the night, so I’m not sleeping more than the early birds; my schedule has just shifted, but she doesn’t accept that.
So as long as the world insists that mornings are superior to the rest of the day, I will rise and grumble (as opposed to shine).
I saw Ghostbusters (the new one) today, and thoroughly enjoyed it. I found it funny and sassy with enough nods to the original that I felt like I was part of an inside joke. But it’s also two weeks after its release and it’s no longer number one at the box office. The new Star Trek is. Which I will see in about two weeks.
I don’t often see movies the day they come out for one main reason–I don’t like crowds (which is a bit hypocritical since I love Disneyland.)
I know what you’re thinking: I should pick smaller movies, the independents, and then I wouldn’t face the crowds. Yeah, the problem with that is I like the big movies. I would rather wait a week or two and see a blockbuster than watch a critically acclaimed independent. (Heck, if you follow me at all you know my taste is the same in books).
There are drawbacks, of course, the first being that watching with a crowd is a more visceral experience. Especially with a comedy. When you’re in a group, you will laugh more, gasp more, and maybe even cry more because you feed off of what others are doing. In many ways we are herd animals. But I have also sat in relatively crowded theaters and been the only one laughing at a joke. When I watched Zootopia, (and I will claim that I had to take my daughter to it even if that is a lie. Well, I did have to take her, but I wanted to see it.) in Albuquerque, I was the only one who laughed at the Walter and Jesse joke. In Albuquerque (I know I said that already.) The lack of the crowd experience doesn’t ruin it for me. I still laugh out loud even if I am the only one laughing.
The other drawback is, of course, spoilers. I have discussed that here in another post. I don’t care about spoilers. I love spoilers. In no way is my experience diminished if I know the ending or the secrets of a plot. In fact I often look up spoilers before deciding to see a movie. I hear you gasping in horror, but there have been studies done on spoilers and they show that knowing the ending lets you take in more of the nuances and depth of the story.
I watched every season of Game of Thrones except this last one one year after they came out. I have glommed onto several shows after they have finished their run, or I’m several years behind (“Paging Dr. Who. Dr. Who, will you please pick up a white courtesy telephone?”). I have this behavior less with books. I was there at midnight for Harry Potter from book three on (Again, I’ll blame my kids, but we both know I’m not fooling anyone), and I’ve reread the Lightbringer series in anticipation for the fourth installment of the trilogy (that is not an error). There will be a fifth too. Sigh.
One of my father’s favorite things to do was to go to downtown L.A. I never understood why. I hated it. I don’t even go to downtown Albuquerque unless I absolutely have to. I become nervous, twitchy, and anxious. This crowd discomfort has been going on a long, long time. Worst part is, I am not made for a rural life either. I need my civilization. So I will continue to see my movies about two weeks late. Hey, you gotta do what you gotta do.
Can we talk villains for a moment? I love villains. I mean I love a good villain to root against. I love the anger they rouse in me while I read, I love the sense of righteousness I can feel when I am against them, I love the comeuppance or repentance at the end. Come on. Who didn’t like it when Umbrage gets taken by the centaurs? Who didn’t like Darth Vader saving his son (but, of course, having to die for all the evil he did)? Who didn’t like the take down of Hydra, even if it meant that the good guys had to go into hiding?
I love having villains in my books. I love writing them. There is something so delicious about writing a twisted, evil character. My villain scenes have always been easy for me to write. They flow out of me. I can picture their mannerisms, their postures, and hear their words with little effort. I do like the “black and white” because the world isn’t.
Which brings me to a small rant. One of the criticisms I’ve received about THE WISH LIST was that the villain was easy to figure out. Folks, I never tried to hide who the villain was. Honestly, it never occurred to me to hide from the reader who the bad guy was. I did keep it from my characters for a bit, but not the readers. It isn’t brain surgery. There are only nine bigger players in the book, and it was a romance. The villain wasn’t going to be the heroine or the hero; there is a child in the book—he wasn’t going to be the villain. There are the three godmothers—it’s not them. Now, I could have been tricky and made the hero’s best friend the villain, but it’s not that kind of book. That leaves two characters. One is the love interest of the best friend. Again, this is a lighter book. It wasn’t her. That leaves the villain. I didn’t hide it.
Okay, maybe I was unoriginal; maybe my books could have had more depth by choosing one of the other characters to be the villain, but I wanted a romp. Besides, the villain had to last through three books. You know who the villain is in the next two books in the series, so why hide it in the first?
I love mysteries, but I rarely write them. My villains are out there in the spotlight, and you know they are villains from the start. (Okay, in YOURS ALWAYS and THE SEA EAGLE under my Gabi Anderson name the villains are more hidden).
In my latest book, THE STONE KEY, the villain is the villain from the moment he appears at the beginning of the story, and when he shows up again in the novel, you know. And once again, he was so easy to write.
Hmmm, maybe I should investigate how a goody two-shoes, unassuming, rule-follower like me finds villains so easy to write. On the other hand, my short stories seem to explore nothing but that side of my psyche.
Books I’m reading now:
Wild Cards edited by Geroge RR Martin
Age of Myth by Michael J Sullivan
Day Six started with a drive down the mountain on its unpaved road and a trek to Manuel Antonio National Park. The hotel we booked was the nicest of our trip. The Costa Verde Hotel. They are the place with the 727 that’s been converted into a hotel casita. No, we didn’t stay in it, although that would have been interesting. It sure was pretty.
There was one event on the way to Manuel Antonio that I have to mention. Years ago, while doing the college tours, we took an airboat ride on the Louisiana bayou and had a close encounter with an alligator. It was about ten feet long and very frightening. I mention this because in Costa Rica, the crocodiles made that beast look puny. There is a bridge over a river just outside of Jaco, where crocs sun themselves on the banks. There was a monster there that must have been 16 feet long (the picture doesn’t do it justice) and there were at least 25 large crocs just hanging out. One of the creepiest things I’ve ever seen.
Anyway, back to Manuel Antonio. This place was amazing. When we parked at the hotel the trees were full of squirrel monkeys, the cutest little golden creatures with cute little whistles. Our hike through the national park showed us three sloths, three bats, two raccoons, two coati, lots of capuchin monkeys, an agouti, and a fer de lance. It was amazing. The beaches within the park were beautiful. They were open that day. Sometimes they are closed because crocs sometimes swim in the waters there. The monkeys, raccoons and one coati came onto the beach to steal food. We watched a raccoon steal an entire bag of chips despite the human playing tug of war with the tote that held the snack and using a slipper to discourage the theft. The monkeys came begging for food too.
The afternoon, as we swam in the pool, an agouti casually took a stroll right by, and then later the most amazing thunderstorm and torrential downpour cooled us off(Hey, it is a rain forest). The next morning, we saw the sloth that makes the hotel its home. Just hanging around, right by the rooms.
All in all Costa Rica wasn’t a relaxing vacation, but we chose not to do the resort thing. We went for the jungles and the wildlife. Okay, so we didn’t see as much as a Nature special, nor did we rough it like true wilderness experts—hey, there is a limit to how many comforts I’m willing to forgo—but it was great. No tan, a few mosquito bites, wonderful people, and an experience unlike anything I’ve done before. The jungle is almost a cliché, but it was wonderful to experience it outside of Disneyland (“This is the rarely seen other side of water.”). I must say the humidity made me appreciate our dry New Mexico weather.
I’ve always said that adventure is overrated. Adventure usually means something’s gone wrong and you have to deal with it. So this was a perfect trip, the kind of adventure that means everything goes smoothly, the kind that gives you the chance to learn new things about the world and yourself.